Friday, October 28, 2005
sighh....I'm feeling the pain now.Probably all the other vball girls will feel the same too....yes,trainings will still go on as usual..but it wun feel the same anymore.duller?quieter?deaden?cant see anymore 100m dash...laughter...ur actions and e way u make fun of pple...nothing...How all the joys we all used to share.From the 1st day...1st competition,youth cup,ivp,friendly matches,the KL trip just this April....These trainings' joys and memories no one else will have besides US. yes...they belong solely to us.I'll keep everything in the treasure box in me.No matter what,nothing can replace these bits and pieces of joys we've shared.Mw,we still love you k.=]U'll oways be a part of us.
;; right from the beginning12:35 AM
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Reached home not long ago.
Went school this morning for sports nutrition UT. It was supposed to start at 830am...but something cocked up wif LEO...so everyone waited till 9.05am and ended up doing on papers...
technologies may not always be reliable.-_-
anw, went tiong bahru for breakfast after tt with Zann & Yiming.
Had Yakun kaya toast,hard boiled eggs n hot milo! Wheeee~
Sometimes it really feels so blissed to have breakfast.
I mean it's like..hmm... it's so good to know tt U're still able to wake up to breathe e morning air,chit chating with friends and at e same time,enjoying the first meal of the day with them.
It's warmly.
=]]
Hope I can have breakfast everyday with the people I like.Family,friends n...
....hah..feeling sleepy now. gonna take a nap to lighten my head..heehee..
Adieuz.
;; right from the beginning12:20 PM
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Pharmacotherapy lesson ended at 5pm today. Tt was like a roller coaster ride.
Scary and exciting.
Anw,had training after lesson. It rained for awhile shortly after we started training.
Waited for the rain to stop n yeaps it did.
Did the normal warm up..dui gang,da fang,spiking,servings and the girls trained the formation.
Hmm..today's shou gan can be counted hai hao ba. Not as bad as I had thought thou.=]. But not up to the standard tt I want still.
Bahhh...had to mention tt I dunno why I felt so fan chang during training.Kept doing some odd stuffs..hmm e usual things tt I will do when I feel like fa-xie-ing.
But Im feeling "peaceful" now. Listening to songs really helps.
Yawns...slpy eyes now.I need sleep. But probably those drugs prescriptions might haunt me in my dreams. --_--".
Haven done rj.--intepret a real prescription given to us by Kevin Yap.
*I need magics...*
;; right from the beginning1:43 AM
Monday, October 24, 2005
Had a 9 out of 10 degree of anger in me just now.Now it has subsided to a 7 degree one.ANGRY!Ma bro reformated the hse desktop n now I've lost all my PP stuffs..as well as my FYP's stuff!!DARNNNN.Im left with only my FYP thesis.WTF can.WTFFFFFFFF.Was sooooo angryyy tt for the 1st time after so longgg I felt myself boiling inside.I wish I could slice him up n feed him to piranhas.Pissed plus super angry.^&^%#&%&^!&*#^!#^&*&!#*(7389718736724621.--_--""""Luckily someone managed to let me get my mind off this matter for a little while.Now Im "cooler".Thankew ya.U made my day,thou U din realise tt.Nitez peeps.Adieuz.
;; right from the beginning1:31 AM
Sunday, October 23, 2005
My grades of all the modules for the past 3 weeks,seem to
further ascertain me tt im really stupid...or probably I shld say that I havent put in any effort to earn better grades.
Im feeling lazyy as usual.
Especially now when I dunno how to get myself started with all these...
PP's due date's on 30th Nov.
doom.
Have yet to get back FYP 1st draft from sup.
final thesis's due on 16th Dec.
There're so many things that I wanna do,but I feel withheld by factors tt will directly or indirectly linked to and affect what I wanna do
No money. yes...1 factor.
Struggling,hard to handle modules.yes...
Disappointing and
worrying grades.yes...
Undone PP.yes...
Incompleted fyp thesis.yes...
--_--""
Suddenly Im scared.Very very
scared.
Of so many many things.
I need my guiding star.
and...
...
..
.
.
.
.
.
Im afraid U've already decided to walk out of my life.
Please stay...even for a little while more.
--
I really need my guiding star now.
Adieuz.
;; right from the beginning1:25 AM
Friday, October 21, 2005
I dunno why Im feeling this way.I dun understand how I end up feeling what Im feeling now.
Realised that I aint as reasonable as I had thought myself to be.
M I being unreasonable to be feeling and thinking this way now?
I dunno.
N Im broken inside.
N U havent sensed it.
Adieuz.
;; right from the beginning12:41 PM
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
Hanged in town with da de and elaine till 4am this morning.The day went like this:Went orchard shop shop with elaine n da de after school yesterday.Afterwhich went Taka makan tok tok..den went walk walk again at far east.den went makan at subway again. n really laughed till peng over some stuffs...anw,after tt decided to go chill at some places. Actually wanted aquadisiac..but last min decided not to.oh ya..i 4gt to mention tt we "tey-ed" for 45 mins or so in the orchard mrt station toilet. loll....settled down at e 24 hr coffee club express after tt.Ice mango tango was nice.time passed...n ya..sat there till rnd 4am...Okies..this was the 1st time I've ever stayed out till so late.n of cos,i anticipated for lots of scoldings.Anything la.....actually it's not tt i cant be bothered u noe.. butIm a saggitarian.I noe i love freedom.e more they control,the more i'll wan to flyy.I just cant be the kind of daughter tt they want.Sometimes it's complicated contradictions.I want so much to live a life of my own, make my own decisions...yet I need to consider bt other factors...So afterall,is it really true tt I haf rights to lead this life of my own..by myself?What r my rights?Whose life is it tt im living??Adieuz.
;; right from the beginning5:33 PM
Sunday, October 16, 2005
*sekai ni hitotsu dake no hana-世界に一つだけの花It's a really nice song by SMAP.=]
;; right from the beginning8:39 PM
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Im craving for pizza,sushi,waffle with ice cream,laksa,tuna bun,spaghetti n lots more!
omg...*drools*
Anybody knows of all the great eating places arnd singapore? Like geylang,chinatown or blablablah??
Tell me can? Tell me how to go oso. Hahah...im a glutton la.
I wanna try out all the food in spore.
=DD
;; right from the beginning5:41 PM
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Have a sudden urge of watching cartoons.
Cartoons as in like-Sleeping beauty,Lill mermaid,Cinderella,Snowwhite n 7dwarfs,Beauty n e Beast,Pinocchio,101 Dalmantians,Doraemon,Smurfs,Peter Pan,Lion King...n blahblah blah...
m I very childish huh?
haha..i wanna zao hui tong nian ma.
but den i also din get to watch so many cartoons when i was young.=[
saded.
=pp
Adieuz.
*congrats to elaine,meiwei,phloy n sihui for comin in 3rd for the flrball 3on3 yesterday.=D*
;; right from the beginning2:51 PM
Monday, October 10, 2005
Probably I've made the wrong step.Now the distance seems to have totally broken off.n it seems as thou I was the one who cause this to happen.because i've been too impatient,tt I kept forcing things to happen?I wish I hadn't pushed things too far.haiz...Im sorry if I'd been really irritating all these whiles. =[(to U.IF u noe who u r.)Nonetheless,thank u for all these simple memories.At least they r memorable to me.=]
;; right from the beginning1:18 AM
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Miraculously I woke up before 12pm today. Initially wanted to return to slp but found myself feeling rather awake V(0_0)v.
Came online,and out of nowhere,all of a sudden,...
thoughts charged into me and I thought...
"Hey,it's a beautiful day ya. Clouds are so white,Sky is bright and clear.n
I should be a Happy girl today!"
I wun let any negative tots overwhelm me today.
Sounds really silly but well =D.
Weekends should oways be beautiful.^^]
In order to make your own weekend a happy one,stop grumbling....you nid to take actions and make things happen.=]
Bleee....
------------
Oh but the thought of,"Tmr's monday..school,lessons..."
-_-""spoils everything.
------------
Adieuz.
*being happy is a choice.
*
;; right from the beginning1:32 PM
yuan lai wo zhi shi tu ran lei le...yuan lai wo bu shuo le...
i feel tired for no reason.
what bt you?
;; right from the beginning12:34 AM
Saturday, October 08, 2005
Met up with Cs n Hl after sch yesterday.
Went for dinner and walked arnd town.
Shopping was fruitful. hee..cos all 3 of us managed to buy something.
I felt the same old feeling slowly coming back. It's the familiar chummy feeling tt I used to feel whenever we're together. But somehow it was lost along e way. Now I felt it coming back.slowlyyy. Im happy. Just hope things will turn fine for all 5 uncontrollables. Cos I dun wanna lose anyone of them. Hopefully our nxt full uncontrollables meet up will be a happy n successful one.
--------------
Felt like going out today to walk walk..but somehow was plan-less. But perhaps such aimless walk would be nice too? Relaxed,freed...
Turned down indirectly for the 3rd time.
There was no direct ans..but i guess that was a more polite way of turning down someone?
However I would have prefered a more straight forward ans...at least that's better than being
left hanging in the mid air,waiting for an answer tt I tot would come.
Nvm..wu shuo wei...im getting use to it.
(coincidentally my wmp is now playing- Gu dan de ren zhong suo wu shuo wei by Jolin-_-)
Feeling so thick skin...n i hate it
Probably I should make up my mind to let this be the last time Im ever gonna initiate such things.
It's time I get such hints ya...
--------------
Adieuz.
;; right from the beginning6:59 PM
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
One month holiday's over.
Been working for the whole of the last week holiday. Tired...but hopefully the return will be good. V^^v
Bet it's the after effects of working and not having enough rest. Im feeling very
restless and
lethargic since the 1st day of school,now I still am. (-___-)
No one &
Nothing seems to be able to
push me on.
......
btw,the jap series <<
Shen ah,qing gei wo duo yi dian shi jian>> is really nice.
The show and its morale are inspiring and meaningful.
It's really sweett as well.
......
when i say go away,stop creating memories in my nick; i dun mean it. I dunno wat im talking abt. -_-
It just seems tt my brain & my heart are
contradicting now.
My brain tells me tt i shld stop being silly and be realistic.
but the little voice from my heart tells me to be brave and fight for what i like.
im confused.
All my emotions and feelings are
invaded and
messed up...by him.
-__-"
This is soooooo sucky!
and it's really
stupid to be troubling over this kind of stuff when i shld be concentratin on my studies now rite.
Arghhhhhhhh~ i hate it.
;; right from the beginning6:26 PM
